I try to make it a regular hobby to keep fresh arrangements of flowers in the home. It was much easier to keep up with when we first moved into our apartment a year and a half ago– I was inspired by living in a space that was my own and that I was completely in love with for the first time in years. I’d make a point to walk to the flower cart a mile down the street, fill a bag with whatever seemed to inspire me on a given day, then walk home and spread the flowers and jars out on the counter to put together different size arrangements– one for each room in the apartment, even the half bathroom.
I’ll never forget the time my partner, Dan, told me that it was one of his favorite things about me– he made me feel like I had this creative hobby, and I loved that he changed my perspective from thinking I was doing a chore for our home to realizing I was making some kind of art, and smiling while doing it.
When I came home last August after spending two months solo overseas, I was a little overwhelmed with how much of a bachelor-pad our home felt like from leaving Dan & Rebel alone all summer. I was also flat broke. Dan and I went to Trader Joes for grocery’s– he was paying since it would still be two weeks until I saw a paycheck, but he made a point to encourage me to pick out a few bundles of flowers and greens and reminded me that “there is always money in the budget for flowers.” (Pictured above with a few house plants to replace the ones that died while I was away.) I went home and made the arrangements pictured at the top– I had specifically picked out iris’s because they will always remind me of my father, and eucalyptus because it reminded me of hiking through eucalyptus forests during my final days trekking in Spain just a week prior.
Honestly, the last two weeks have felt so heavy. Some combination of the full moon that lasted through three nights of overtime-filled night-shifts, Mercury reckoning in retrograde & a lot of sadness within my work family as many of them have experienced huge losses by means of death of loved ones and the loss of one of our coworkers. At the end of last week one of my best friends & coworkers addressed the funks both of us had been floating around in and we agreed that we didn’t necessarily feel “sad,” but “bogged-down.” I’ve felt overwhelming sadness in the last year– this didn’t quite feel the same– I just felt flat, un-energized and generally heavy.
There is a heaviness that comes from the perfect storm of grief, dark/cold weather & intense astrological energy.
I have been out of practice with my floral hobby, but was quickly re-inspired while on an ordinary shopping trip to Trader Joe’s. I realized the first tiny step I could take to come out of the darkness was to fill my home with fresh flowers. It’s creatively artistic and therapeutic and by lightening up the environment I occupy, I find my mood lightens up too. Sometimes I often forget that something so simple can drastically change the direction of my emotions, but I’m reluctant to have remembered this week.
If you’re feeling the heaviness too, spare a little room in your budget for flowers this week, take reprieve knowing that Mercury is out of retrograde, and celebrate the New Moon with any kind of ritual that helps you let go of what is not serving you or what is standing in your way of your joy and desires. (I like to burn things– but I’ll save that for another post!)
That was beautiful